“Oh my god. That’s… that’s my roommate…” – Imagine staring at your screen, heart pounding through your chest, as you realize the person responding to your anonymous gay dating ad isn’t just anyone – it’s the supposedly straight guy who sleeps twenty feet from your bedroom.
The same guy whose girlfriend is probably sitting on your shared couch right now.
For one person, this nightmare scenario became his reality when his attempt to explore his sexuality collided spectacularly with his home life, creating perhaps the most awkward roommate situation imaginable.
The Setup
Our storyteller, who came to Reddit for advice, is a bisexual man who’s kept that part of himself completely under wraps.
He’d fooled around with guys occasionally between girlfriends but never breathed a word about these experiences to anyone.
Recently, curiosity got the better of him. Wanting to try bottoming for the first time, he did what many curious men used to do – he posted an anonymous ad on Craigslist seeking an experienced partner.
“Wanted to see if an experienced, clean top could break me in,” he explained in his post. Nothing too unusual so far.
The Jaw-Drop Moment
After filtering through several disappointing responses, he received one that made his blood run cold.
The interested party? None other than his longtime friend and roommate (yes, they actually lived together) – a supposedly straight man with a girlfriend who ALSO lived in their shared apartment.
“He has no idea it’s me,” the guy explained, clearly panicking. “I don’t know what to do.”
But here’s the kicker – his roommate had included an X-rated photo with his response. And our narrator’s reaction? “I liked it.”
Talk about complicated.
The Ethical Dilemma
This accidental discovery drops our guy into a tangled web of secrets:
His roommate – Mr. “Let’s-grab-beers-and-watch-the-game” – is apparently cruising for male hookups behind his girlfriend’s back.
The girlfriend – who shares their living space – is completely in the dark.
The roommate has unknowingly exposed his secret desires to the exact person he likely wants to keep them from.
And our storyteller? He’s suddenly seeing his living situation through an entirely new, tempting lens.
The Advice Rolls In
When he asked for guidance, commenters offered everything from practical wisdom to mischievous suggestions.
One voice of reason advised caution: “Ignore it and move on. Just imagine how awkward it all gets if you do reply to him, what with the girlfriend and you all living together…”
The most dramatic suggestion painted two very different futures: “Ghost him if you want to save yourself from one giant cluster mess of a situation. Do it if you’re looking for a lot of change real quick.”
For those bold enough to choose option two, they suggested an approach worthy of a HBO drama: “Meet someplace nearby and see what his excuse is for leaving. Approach him from behind and say his email or username. The reaction would be priceless to say the least.”
The Bigger Picture
This situation touches on something many gay and bi men have encountered – discovering someone you know is also exploring their sexuality on the down-low.
For men who present as straight but seek encounters with other men, the motivations can vary widely.
Some might be questioning or exploring. Others might identify as mostly straight but have specific curiosities. And yes, some might simply be cheating on their partners.
Whatever path our storyteller chose, his experience highlights how the walls between our public and private lives are paper-thin. That guy loudly proclaiming his heterosexuality at the bar? He might be browsing Grindr on his phone under the table.
Sometimes the hottest connections are hiding in plain sight – making us question not just what we think we know about others, but how far we’re willing to go to satisfy our own curiosity.